The psychological impact rabbit owners experience when their pet is diagnosed with Encephalitozoon cuniculi (E. cuniculi) can be overwhelming and deeply distressing. This parasitic infection, which affects the brain, kidneys, and eyes, often brings a slow and unpredictable progression of symptoms, leading to significant emotional strain.
Winter’s Back Story
Winter was a very important member of our family. He was our first adopted rescue bunny that had been dumped on the side of a major highway. We brought him into our home to be a bonded partner for our permanent foster girl rabbit Onyx. The pair lived alongside her bonded parents Avery and Grilly and they became known as the “fab four”.
We were so happy to see Winter thrive, develop trust and unconditional love after surviving such a rough start in life. One day, almost three years later, our precious little boy suddenly began to act not quite right and within 20 minutes started wobbling, dragging his rear paw, developed a bulging eye with nystagmus (rhythmic eye movement) and a head tilt. In a complete panic, I thought he was having a stroke, was devastated and in that moment, I felt so helpless and alone.
We raced to the vet’s office and ended up leaving him there overnight for treatment and testing. The doctor had a suspicion his symptoms were from E. cuniculi infection. I had no idea what that was so when I got home I googled everything I could possibly find on the topic. I read what it was, what the symptoms were, how it was spread, and about the treatment (or lack thereof). I tried to wrap my head around it, but until you experience it first hand, they are just words on a page.
Winter & The Vet
The next day after multiple tests we went to pick Winter up. My beautiful, vibrant, thriving and happy bunny was no longer to be found. His x-rays showed that Winter had no ear infection, no abnormality of the brain. They did however show the beginning stage of kidney disease, another byproduct of this parasitic illness. That along with the vestibular (neurologic) symptoms Winter was showing, the doctor deduced his symptoms were from E. cuniculi and not ear infection and prescribed a very rigid course of treatment.
We left with a bag of meds for him along with some for his bonded mates as they needed to be treated too- it is a contagious infection spread through spores in the urine. I knew Winter would have to be isolated for a time and set up a playpen in the kitchen nearby his mates and everything he needed for treatment. With the tilted head, Winter could only walk in circles and not for long as vertigo made him very sick.
I tried to keep positive though and talked to him continually. No matter what was ahead in his care, my little guy would be worth every sleepless, anxious, upsetting moment of recovery and we would celebrate any tiny milestone he’d make. I fed him by hand, lovingly gave him chamomile tea and water with a syringe and changed his bedding daily, sometimes twice a day. When he napped I napped. Or wrote. I started writing my feelings down.
Everything I read about E.c was very clinical, but nobody tells you to be prepared for the emotional, physical and psychological toll this illness will take on you, your bun and your family. This is a gut-wrenching, heartbreaking and horrifying illness to experience. I was lucky enough to have found a support group on facebook (Help For Head Tilt Hoppers) which I am beyond grateful for. This community knew. They knew the stages, the meds, the feels.
Day 6 was the day Winter began to roll. It is described as alligator rolling because once it starts it is hard to stop. Watching this is terrifying. The anxiety and fear was at an all time high. I needed my community then and they were very supportive.
I sat thinking about my emotions in the quiet of night and as I wrote them down I noticed something. Grief. I was experiencing all the stages of grief. Yes Winter was still alive, but he was not the little boy I had had a week before. In the midst of caring for him, I was also experiencing grief which made the situation even harder to deal with. It started with shock and continued with panic, helplessness, sadness, nervousness, anger, hope, expectation, depression, frustration, loneliness, bargaining, fear and the worse was yet to come… hopelessness, resignation, guilt, sorrow and finally regret.
On day 8 Winter became critical. He was not eating or going to the bathroom, had stomach gas and I knew GI Stasis was setting in. This can be a death sentence for a rabbit if not treated. The vet was gone and wouldn’t be in until the morning. My support came through via video chat and Marianne helped me with the feeding of his critical care.
The next morning I dropped him off at the vet. Of course I was a nervous wreck all day and although trying to be positive, in retrospect I knew what was coming. After more testing, the vet said he had deteriorated more than expected, his kidneys and bladder had multiple fully formed stones, showing that his disease had worsened. He was in pain, barely moving and in that moment we made the toughest decision a pet parent can ever make. We said our goodbyes as the vet helped him cross the rainbow bridge.
The Psychological Impact of E. c
Helplessness and Guilt
Watching your beloved rabbit suffer from E. cuniculi can leave you feeling powerless. The unpredictable nature of the disease, along with limited treatment options, can make you feel guilty for not recognizing symptoms sooner or believing you’re not doing enough to help. This guilt can intensify if your rabbit’s condition deteriorates despite your best efforts. This psychological strain can wreak havoc on your physical health.
Chronic Anxiety and Uncertainty
E. cuniculi often has an uncertain prognosis. Some rabbits recover partially, while others worsen over time. This unpredictability can cause ongoing anxiety. You may constantly monitoring your rabbit for signs of improvement or decline. The stress of making medical decisions—such as whether to pursue aggressive treatments or consider euthanasia—adds to this anxiety.
Emotional Burnout and Caregiver Fatigue
Caring for a rabbit with E. cuniculi can effect your mental, physical, psychological and emotional well being. It is truly exhausting. Rabbits may need assistance with mobility, medication, and specialized care, which can consume a significant amount of time and energy. This constant care can lead to emotional burnout and feelings of isolation, especially when support from others is lacking.
Grief and Anticipatory Loss
Even before your rabbit crosses the rainbow bridge, you may experience anticipatory grief—mourning the expected loss while your rabbit is still alive. Watching a once-active rabbit struggle to move, eat, or interact can be heartbreaking, triggering deep sadness and mourning for the life they once shared.
Financial Stress
Veterinary care for chronic conditions like E. cuniculi can be expensive, especially with the need for ongoing medications, diagnostic tests, and possibly mobility aids. Financial strain can add another layer of stress and guilt, particularly if you feel limited in how much treatment you can afford.
Isolation and Lack of Understanding
Many people may not understand the depth of the bond between a rabbit and its owner, leaving you feeling isolated in your grief. Unlike dogs or cats, rabbits are often underestimated as companion animals, making it harder to find empathy and support when coping with your rabbit’s illness.
Difficult Decision-Making and Moral Dilemmas
You may struggle with deciding when to continue treatment and when it might be kinder to let your rabbit go. The fear of prolonging suffering versus the fear of letting go too soon can create a painful internal conflict, leading to indecision and emotional turmoil.
Trauma from Witnessing Suffering
Severe cases of E. cuniculi can cause distressing symptoms like head tilt, seizures, “alligator” rolling and paralysis. Witnessing these can be traumatic, leaving lasting emotional and psychological scars even after your rabbit has passed away. These images and memories can replay in your mind, causing prolonged distress.
Coping Strategies
E. cuniculi not only affects rabbits, but deeply impacts the psychological well-being of the people who love them. Acknowledging this emotional burden is crucial for finding healthy ways to cope and heal.
- Seeking Support: Joining rabbit care groups or online communities can provide emotional and psychological support and practical advice.
- Self-Compassion: Reminding yourself that you are doing the best you can can help ease guilt.
- Journaling: Writing your emotions as you are experiencing them can help you work through them.
- Professional Help: Speaking with a counselor or therapist experienced in pet loss can be beneficial.
- Memorializing the Rabbit: Creating a tribute or memorial can help in processing grief and honoring their pet’s life after loss.
Winter’s Poem
The pain and regret of constantly thinking “did I do the right thing?”, “should I have held out longer?” plague me still. When I realized I was experiencing this psychological anguish as an adult, I couldn’t imagine what it would be like for a child to have to deal it. A child whose rabbit was maybe his first pet, maybe her best friend and to one who never experienced loss. How would they deal with their emotions? How would they express them?
After Winter’s passing I learned that during his illness I had been experiencing anticipatory grief. I wrote this poem about his illness and the psychological effect it had on me. The highlighted words are the different stages of grief. I am still wracked with guilt when I think about him, wondering if I gave up too soon. But then I look at the reality of his situation and it helps. Every case of E-c s different, but the psychological strain is similar for all of us who have had to endure it.
Winter was a bunny who loved to play
Zoomies through tunnels and binkies all day
Into his litterbox after he’d plop
Eating his hay then out to flop…
Until it changed one day in June
When mama saw something wrong at noon
She offered Winter his favorite treat
He turned his head not wanting to eat
Mama picked him up and gave him a hug
Then put him back down upon the rug
He wobbled away dragging his paw
Mama was shocked at what she saw
She scooped Winter up and sat in a chair
Noticing his eye quiver, bulge and stare
His sweet furry head with butter soft ears
Began to tilt, increasing her fears
Beginning to sob, tears welled in her eye
Panicked that Winter was going to die
Mama held onto Winter hugging him tight
“I promise my sweet boy, I’ll make everything right”
She never felt this helpless before
Digging for strength right down to her core
Mama picked up her phone and called the vet
Telling the receptionist she was really upset
“My bunny is sick, I think it’s a stroke”
Mama was crying out loud while she spoke
“Come over right now and we’ll take a look”
So they jumped in the car and off they took
When Winter arrived, the vet started his care
Mama was sad it was too much to bear
The vet thought he knew what made him so sick
A parasite he said attacked Winter real quick
“I’ll know more after x rays and a special blood test…
He’ll be fine staying here, he’ll get lots of rest”
Mama was nervous to leave him alone
But knew he’d be safe with the care they had shown
Mama never heard of this awful parasite
Research was her plan for the rest of the night
Report after Report she read and she read
Until the anger exploded in her head
“Why does my rabbit have to suffer so?”
Was all that his mama wanted to know
Tossing and turning barely sleeping at all
She waited and prayed all day for the call
Hoping the vet would say everything’s fine
The tests that he did showed a promising sign
Finally he called later that day
He’s doing a bit better he started to say
“Come pick him sometime around five,
I’ll come out and chat when you arrive”
Expecting to see a big change in their son
Disappointment creeped in when they looked at their bun
Winter looked so fragile and sick
A long course of meds should do the trick
The x rays showed Winters head looked great
But his kidneys, he said, were in different state
The parasite had done a number on him
Depressed mama thought the outlook was grim
“You have lots of work and medicine to give,
In order for him to get better and live”
Mama put Winter in a bunny playpen
Inside the kitchen, but near the den
Feeling frustrated, she couldn’t think right
A tray full of drugs for morning and night
Washing his bedding once or twice everyday
The same daily schedule just on replay
Loneliness set in as the days rolled by
Time after time she would sigh and then cry
“I wish there was someone that could understand”
And then she found a group that knew first hand
They gave her advice and filled her cup
Now she felt better and wouldn’t give up
Down on her knees while petting his head
“Please let him get better” mama plead
“I’ll do anything to make it right”
She bargained out loud with no one in sight
Knowing that Winter was missing his brood,
Mama brought Grilly over to bolster his mood
Then on day 6 Winter started to roll
His whole body contorted out of control
Fearful that he would hurt his back
Since bunnies spines can easily crack
She trembled and cried as she watched her poor bun
Over and over he spun and he spun
Two days later Winter got much worse
“What had we done to deserve this curse?”
Refusing to eat and so full of gas
Mama rubbed his tummy to help it pass
This situation is hopeless she was starting to feel
About this hand that seemed so unreal
The vet said to bring Winter back in
As soon as you’re here, his exam I’ll begin
Mama knew in her heart what the outcome would be
And it was confirmed when she called him at three
In less than 10 days his kidneys were failing
Mama accepted the parasite was prevailing
The vet said we had a decision to make
Mama knew that her heart would totally break
How could she say “Give up the fight,
It’s time to help him into the light”
Heavy with deep feelings of guilt
For giving up on her bun with the head tilt
The time had come to say their goodbyes
Mama held Winter tight with tears in her eyes
As she wept, they dripped onto his face
How could she leave him behind in this place
Full of sorrow she couldn’t let him go
And prayed that he knew she loved him so
Day after day mama was full of regret
No matter how she tried she couldn’t forget
“Why did I do it? I gave up too soon”
I wish I could go back to the 28th of June
Deep down she knew it was the compassionate choice
Knowing someday they’d be together and rejoice
Final Thoughts…
The psychological impact of E. cuniculi on rabbit caregivers is profound, often marked by feelings of helplessness, anxiety, guilt, and anticipatory grief. The emotional toll of watching your rabbit suffer, combined with the psychological stress of making difficult medical decisions and providing intensive care, can lead to caregiver burnout and isolation.
This experience can be deeply traumatic, leaving lasting emotional scars even after your rabbit’s passing. Acknowledging these complex psychological emotions and seeking support—whether through compassionate communities (the fb group and Rabbit Care Virtual Support via Instagram for personalized help), professional counseling, or self-care—can help you navigate the illness. If your bun develops head tilt, dragging or paralyzed legs, nystagmus or any other symptom get to an exotic vet immediately as time is of the essence.
